Hey there, friends! Whew! Posts here have been few and far between but I think y’all can understand why. It’s been a busy last few months for our family but I’m excited to catch you up today on all things baby number 2. Let’s start with the most exciting news that it’s a …
baby boy!!
With having Louie and two boy dogs, I honestly know this role of boy mom quite well so looks like I get to keep my title of Queen of this castle for a little longer … or maybe forever, who knows, ha!
We shared our pregnancy news on Instagram over Thanksgiving because, as many of y’all know, it took us quite some time to conceive this sweet angel. We trust that however life works out that all is the way it should be and timing is always perfect so, despite receiving this blessing in the midst of a whirlwind of change, we welcome it and are very excited to finally be adding to our family!
We shot these photos in October, I think, with our good friend, Kaylee, who many of you may remember from when I lived here in Jacksonville. We went to high school together and she’d always shoot my blog photos. She has since become a NICU RN and I couldn’t be more proud of her … as well as thankful for coming out of photography retirement to help us capture some sweet memories of early pregnancy! Thankfully I was feeling okay this day and, as you can see, Louie was absolutely in stitches for half of the shoot because of how silly Kaylee is. She was cracking him up, ha!
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Anyway, I just wanted to make sure I memorialized this news here on the blog as it’s always been a bit of an online diary of sorts. We can’t wait to meet this little one … it’ll be here before we know it and it’ll be fun to share how this experience in the U.S. has been different than the one in the UK.
In case you missed it, I did a little Q&A on Instagram after sharing the news in November so I’ll share that below to catch you up!
PREGNANCY Q&A
Did you find out before you moved, or after?
We found out 10 days AFTER we moved on September 23rd!
How long did it take you to conceive?
We had been trying most months for about two years.
When are you due?
May 19th!
Did you do anything different to conceive?
Well, we weren’t really trying in August due to being so busy ahead of our move. Literally, everything we did was outside of what they say typically leads to conception… it was a very stressful month, we conceived on a day outside of the fertile window, and our diet and alcohol intake weren’t the best due to a busy social calendar and lots of eating out as it was our last month in the UK. I wouldn’t recommend this approach to anyone, but it’s the reason why we really scratched our heads when we saw a positive on the pregnancy test!
How does your second pregnancy feel?
It was a very different first trimester than Louie’s… I couldn’t keep my eyes open and I slept 16 hours most days, I had so many taste aversions that I never really wanted to eat anything, and underlying nausea. It was brutal! But this one… everything is much more subtle and I feel good for the most part. I’m definitely tired and I go to bed at about 8 pm every night! But I’m not tired quite like I was last time. More than anything else, I’m hungry! I don’t have any crazy taste aversions, although I haven’t been loving coffee the way I normally do. Overall, this time around has been much easier!
When are you due?
We are due on May 19, 2025.
Will you try for a VBAC?
Absolutely! And I confirmed that my group of doctors were okay with that. I don’t want another C-section unless it’s medically necessary.
[For anyone reading who may not know what a VBAC is, it’s a vaginal birth after C-section. Every OB has a different comfortability with their patient trying to deliver vaginally after they have already had a C-section so, it’s important to ask if it’s something that’s important to you. As a nurse, we were always taught that the patient has autonomy to choose what is right as it pertains to their healthcare and I still have that same stance. It should be the mother’s choice. It’s her baby, her body. Of course, doctors have a knowledge-base and skill-set worth considering and that’s what they are there to provide so you can make an informed decision so, a conversation about this with your doctor is really important.]
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Why a VBAC?
It’s always been my personal preference to let my body and baby lead when it comes to birth so I’d prefer to not be induced and not to elect a surgery that could otherwise be prevented. I was 41 weeks and 6 days when I was induced with Louie and I ended up needing an emergency C-section. Research shows that induction is more likely to lead to C-sections than if a woman goes into labor naturally and, while, I did ultimately choose induction along with my midwives in the UK [because 42 weeks was where I started to feel uncomfortable due to some research I had read about risk of stillborn after that point] … it was still not the way I wanted my birth to go. And, obviously, you can’t ever plan birth. I am beyond aware of that, ha. But living in the UK opened my eyes to the practice of midwifery and the study of how women have births for centuries before we had a more Westernized medical model and it is so much more empowering. Our bodies are incredible, we know that but, the way we’ve seen birth done in the U.S. is so far from how birth has gone historically-speaking and the outcomes are far less tragic than what we see today. Also, let me be clear, I am a Registered Nurse at the end of the day. I think there is certainly a place for doctors and medical interventions but, I do personally think birth has become more medicalized than is really needed.
Anyway, all that to say … with Louie, I was hoping to have a non-medicalized birth in the birthing center which, in the UK, is typically connected to a hospital if, during labor, you do need any sort of medical intervention. And, I wish this was more widely available in the U.S. I actually just hired a doula the other day who told me about a place that is similar here in Jacksonville so I am going to look into that.
But yeah, ultimately, the reason is because I believe in my body’s ability to birth this baby without the help of a surgical team. Research shows that the lower the interventions that you have in birth, the better the outcomes for both mom and baby. If a medical intervention is necessary for the health and safety of me and baby, then fine! But, if at all possible, I want a low intervention birth.
How far apart in age will Louie and this baby be?
They will be just over 4 years apart, which I love!
How old are you and John?
John is 42, and I am 38. I will be 39 when I have this baby!
Will your baby have dual citizenship?
Yes, this baby will be eligible for dual citizenship in the US and the UK. We need to go through the process of making it official, and I need to figure out how to do that at some point! Because John is British and I am American, all of our kids will be eligible for dual citizenship.
How do you feel about having two boys?
To be honest, I feel like I’ve always received little hints from the Universe or God that whenever we were able to finally conceive that it’ll be a boy. The only other boy name that we agree on isn’t one you see used very often … and it just so happened that I’d see it everywhere in Windsor. But you likely wouldn’t notice it if it wasn’t a name that meant anything to you. I mean, honesty, it’s a name I absolutely love for a girl, as well … maybe even a little moreso for a girl but we had another girl name picked out that we likely would have used over this one … so, I kind of thought ‘oh okay, so that’s definitely my sign that – whenever it happens – it’ll be a boy. And here we are! Ha, I mean .. I love the idea of giving Louie the gift of a sibling so we’d be happy either way. We also got to a point where we were like ‘even if it was just us and Louie, that’s enough for us’. Struggling to conceive really is a lesson in surrender and acceptance and gratitude. So, we would have absolutely loved to have a little girl … and I could certainly say a few things about gender disappointment if it was something you wanted to discuss … but, ultimately, we are really excited. Having Louie has been a dream for us and we think our experience with this little boy will be no different.
Did pregnancy healthcare influence your move?
No, it didn’t. There are pros and cons to both systems and I’m not personally in favor of one over the other. I think both need to make major improvements in how they care for women and families in and out of the hospital and in and around this season of life.
Would you have kids earlier in life if you could?
The only way I know how to answer this question is to say that I wouldn’t change anything about how my life has unfolded! Had my life unfolded any other way I wouldn’t have found so many of my life’s biggest loves and passions, like London, the UK, and traveling. All of that led me to so many beautiful and more rich and wider perspectives about life and the world that I’m so grateful for. All of these things also led me to find John! There are certainly biological perks to conceive earlier but there are so many beautiful perks to having kids later in life, so never question the path you’re on.
Will this be your last baby?
No idea! I’ve always thought I’d love to have three but we will see! This obviously depends on a lot of things.
Did you ever hesitate to share?
No, I didn’t struggle with fear of what people would think at all. I actually couldn’t wait to share! It was hard for me to keep it a secret.
How old were you when you had Louie?
I was 35. Don’t let society tell you you’re too old to become a Mom. Of course, the older you get, the harder it could be but, it is likely not impossible for you. I definitely recommend looking into your own hormones and fertility as early as possible because, everyone is different! You just never know where your egg reserve is and, same with your partner, you don’t know what their sperm quality is like. So, start getting curious even if you don’t have a long-term partner at the moment. I probably should speak for all of us us millennials but myself and so many friends have agreed that we wish we would have been encouraged to look into these things so much earlier. And that’s another reason why, as much as I hold doctors in a high regard, I don’t feel like their educational structure is perfect. OB’s are often not educated enough on hormones, for example, yet our hormones affect so much of how we feel overall. I did a whole podcast episode on this so, yeah, not bashing doctors [please don’t misunderstand me at all] … I just think there’s more for us to know about our bodies than we take the time to learn and understand. So, yeah! Okay, wow, I took that very simple question to an extreme. Soz.
Alright, that’s all I have for y’all today! Let me know if you have any other questions! I feel like I haven’t anything as it pertains to pregnancy this time around so let me know if there’s something you want me to cover — what i’m wearing in our second trimester, names, how we’re decorating the nursery, etc. Leave a comment below and I’ll see you next time! Thanks for stopping by!
Oh! Also … my dress is old from Red Dress Boutique … I think … but it might have also been from Petal & Pup. They are similar retailers so check them both out. Red Dress has a fun Valentine’s Day new arrivals section right now and Petal & Pup has some really cute warm weather getaway new arrivals. But, both are great places to look for dresses if you’re expecting or have your baby shower coming up! Check out what they have and … Louie’s cute big brother tee is linked there for you! Okay, bye for now! xo.
